just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Boobs are out for the taking
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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