why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Randomize
