It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
17 of the Dumbest Defenses Heard in Court
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
These 19 Ladies Love Pegging Their Men
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink