Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Randomize
