found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
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