matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Randomize
