Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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