After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
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