so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I booty called her while she was in labor.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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