Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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