He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
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