My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
