I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Randomize
