Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
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