kristin has been a bad kristin
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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