i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
