well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
