Texts From Last Night

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  (209): View more from California

  I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.

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  (209): I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own. http://tfl.nu/zoa7
  Replies (72) Good night (882) Bad night (3327)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.

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  (973): i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for. http://tfl.nu/2a8f
  Replies (50) Good night (948) Bad night (4715)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.

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  (908): The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels. http://tfl.nu/nz1k
  Replies (5) Good night (4691) Bad night (745)
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid

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  (708): She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid http://tfl.nu/fpm2
  Replies (26) Good night (8475) Bad night (936)
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  (479): View more from Arkansas

  I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.

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  (479): I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting. http://tfl.nu/hwr8
  Replies (14) Good night (4967) Bad night (959)
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.

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  (724): Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part. http://tfl.nu/1dsi
  Replies (28) Good night (8130) Bad night (1364)
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  (302): View more from Delaware

  didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official

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  (302): didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official http://tfl.nu/mdan
  Replies (15) Good night (4721) Bad night (1143)
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  (650): View more from California

  OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.

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  (650): OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS. http://tfl.nu/26xz
  Replies (37) Good night (9925) Bad night (2273)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.

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  (512): Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there. http://tfl.nu/vwmy
  Replies (3) Good night (1790) Bad night (653)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes

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  (519): If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes http://tfl.nu/ayyp
  Replies (29) Good night (4179) Bad night (1319)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.

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  (678): God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job. http://tfl.nu/ew2c
  Replies (2) Good night (1409) Bad night (851)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar

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  (614): Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar http://tfl.nu/rsss
  Replies (3) Good night (1630) Bad night (715)
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?

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  (920): there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room? http://tfl.nu/s38b
  Replies (8) Good night (621) Bad night (1321)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.

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  (301): Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you. http://tfl.nu/00du
  Replies (1) Good night (406) Bad night (702)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?

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  (301): there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night? http://tfl.nu/hxw0
  Replies (1) Good night (749) Bad night (424)

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