Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
My vagina is very pro this idea
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