Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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