He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
i believe in u and ur pee
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
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