Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
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