i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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