Texts From Last Night

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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer

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  (201): we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer http://tfl.nu/68pg
  Replies (39) Good night (2738) Bad night (614)
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  (904): View more from Florida

  im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!

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  (904): im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend! http://tfl.nu/e3rl
  Replies (50) Good night (3214) Bad night (1106)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees

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  (201): we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees http://tfl.nu/26hp
  Replies (43) Good night (3017) Bad night (950)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.

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  (412): woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered. http://tfl.nu/z2cy
  Replies (28) Good night (10888) Bad night (739)
• Favorite

  (937): View more from Ohio

  he is so annoying

  (513): View more from Ohio

  so stop sleeping with him

  (937): View more from Ohio

  yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk

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  (937): he is so annoying (513): so stop sleeping with him (937): yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk http://tfl.nu/y8qk
  Replies (25) Good night (5152) Bad night (1188)
• Favorite

  (605): View more from South Dakota

  I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories

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  (605): I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories http://tfl.nu/0d8y
  Replies (14) Good night (4682) Bad night (594)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.

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  (651): how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts. http://tfl.nu/ixjv
  Replies (634) Good night (5402) Bad night (6378)
• Favorite

  (763): View more from Minnesota

  The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.

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  (763): The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins. http://tfl.nu/k74l
  Replies (8) Good night (2508) Bad night (722)
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  Damn you and your Monday night power hours.

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  (207): Damn you and your Monday night power hours. http://tfl.nu/3ta4
  Replies (2) Good night (1379) Bad night (692)
• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.

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  (760): I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free. http://tfl.nu/mdao
  Replies (7) Good night (3065) Bad night (1103)
• Favorite

  (618): View more from Illinois

  I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60

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  (618): I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60 http://tfl.nu/6i7r
  Replies (10) Good night (1323) Bad night (974)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.

  (540): View more from Virginia

  you also need to get my treadmill fixed.

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  (540): The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours. (540): you also need to get my treadmill fixed. http://tfl.nu/v31c
  Replies (7) Good night (864) Bad night (470)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20

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  (310): i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20 http://tfl.nu/ve2e
  Replies (4) Good night (796) Bad night (320)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET

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  (425): Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET http://tfl.nu/8n1t
  Replies (5) Good night (815) Bad night (385)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...

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  (612): We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game... http://tfl.nu/bxkh
  Replies (2) Good night (450) Bad night (222)

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