Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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