If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
