Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
