North Korea, Best Korea!
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Randomize
