your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
