I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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