wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
I love you. Go after that dick
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Randomize
