So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Randomize
