make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
