I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
