I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
Randomize
