Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Randomize
