Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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