12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
What drink are we having for lunch?
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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