Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
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counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
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i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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