Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
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