i may or may not be watching the land before time
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Randomize
