Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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