come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Randomize
