Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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