whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
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