he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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