I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
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we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
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its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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