we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Randomize
