this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Randomize