he shaved USA in his pubs
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
You brought string cheese to the strip club
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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